Rachel Killington is feeling the pressure in her temporary role as linchpin of the radio station’s team out and about in the locality. Anything can/will go wrong My initial two-week stint as Black Thunder Team co-ordinator has led me to realise some otherwise unnoticed observations. Anything that possibly can go wrong, will go wrong, just when you need it to go right; a combination of hard work and stress does wonders for the waistline; and a big hug does wonders when you’re feeling down. (As does wine, but unfortunately consuming half a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc at work may lead to certain eyebrows being raised.)
Personally, I feel I’ve been struggling from day one. There’s so much to organise, and just when it seems I’m finally scrabbling my way to the summit of the mountain of work I have to do, more gets piled on top. I’ve been told by several people that I’m doing fine, but I wanted to be better than just ‘fine’. I had utopian visions of breezing in, doing a whole week’s worth of work in a couple of days then having time to relax, and because that has been impossible I somehow feel I’ve let myself and everyone else down. Abandoned for a shipAt home things are difficult too - my boyfriend Rob has decided that instead of assisting me in my hour of need, he would rather be shivering his timbers and scrubbing the decks, so has left me alone in favour of ten days at sea off the coast of Italy, sailing with John (Black Thunder co-ordinator when not on holiday) and his shipmates. Yes, there are plus points - I no longer have to worry about falling down the loo in the middle of the night because he’s not here to leave the seat up. I don’t have to endure football and F1 racing when I’d much rather be watching the Eastenders omnibus, and if I feel like eating ice cream and crisps for dinner then I can. But it’s always nice to have someone there when you come home late, exhausted, miserable and hungry. (My cat has started to slink away whenever she hears me come in because I have no one else to talk to at night except her, and she’s had quite an earbashing already!) Extended stayMy three weeks at the helm has already extended to four - John has decided that he’s having such a nice time away from work that he is going to stay on board for another week, so my trial is far from over. I’m hoping that as I get into a routine the pressure will ease, but the nature of the job is that no two days are ever the same, and often work comes in at the last moment, and I find that slightly disconcerting. I guess I need to focus on the positive points. The Black Thunder Team have attended every event that was booked in, and then some added extras, and they’ve all been relatively trouble free. Children have been taken to school, stickers have been handed out, donuts have been delivered to workplaces, links have been delivered on time, and I’m still (miraculously) alive to tell the tale. I just never expected it to be quite so difficult. The very bestI’m determined to do the very best job I can, not only because I know I’ll be letting the team down if I don’t, but I need to prove to myself that I can do it, and do it all on my own. I know I’m more than capable of doing the job, and I’m grateful that I’ve been given the opportunity to prove that. So from now on I’m not going to get annoyed when I get phone calls at 6am. I’m not going to get stressed when I have 164 emails in my inbox, and I’m not going to dissolve into tears when everything seems to be going wrong. I’m going to grit my teeth, slap a big smile on my face and do the very best I can, because that’s all that I can do. And my mum always told me, ‘If you do your best, whatever happens will be for the best.’ See Rachel's previous job logs:Do you find that your high aims and ambitions are sabotaged by things going wrong? Have you fallen (or caused someone to fall) down the toilet in the middle of the night? Email Rachel your comments and experiences. | 
