Matt's job log: 14
Matt Atkins is working for the NHS while he considers his next move. Disbelief ‘if you can keep a positive frame of mind, your stop-gap job doesn’t have to become the only job you’ll ever have and you may get more than you thought out of it. Just try not to let it take over your life…’
It’s hard to believe that those words are my own. Fair enough…that’s somewhat of an overstatement, but once again I think I’ve made the mistake of failing to practise what I preach. I like to think I’m fairly useful when it come to advice. I sit cross legged serenely dispensing wisdom to those who seek it like a more handsome Yoda - it appears though, that I’m useless at following it myself. The above paragraph came from an article I wrote earlier this month about stop-gap jobs. For the purpose of the story, I took the angle that they don’t have to be the spirit-crushing, inspiration-robbing bore that many may have you believe. It’s just that, I’ve sort of stopped believing that myself. I’m officially stuck in a job. And it’s taken me quite a while to realise it. DesperationI guess it’s an easy thing to stumble into and at first I don’t seem to notice. While being relatively well occupied with a dead-end job I’ve been making enough money to cover bills and booze, with enough left over to pick up a bite to eat here and there. But in time, the long hours spent in a job that I’m beginning to hate have taken their toll. I’ve spent months trying to convince myself that I’m making the effort, trying to persuade strangers that I do something more interesting than temping. Eventually though, I’ve figured it out. My job is dead-end one, and I haven’t been trying that hard to get out of it. I can’t really understand why it’s taken so long to figure out. The situation at work is still a nightmare. I spend the weekends worrying about going back in on a Monday, mainly because, despite the reassurances from my managers, I know exactly what’s coming; we’ll still be understaffed, I’ll be too busy and too out of depth to do the job properly, and it’ll leave me stressed. It’s not as if the job is one which I can leave in the office at the end of the day. As my work revolves around sick people, I find it hard not to worry about it when I’m not there. The long and short of the situation is that, one way or another, I refuse to stay there any longer. I have to find something else. DeterminationBut this post isn’t just a tale of woe, I promise. My brief depression soon turned into anger at the situation, and then into a much more useful state of renewed determination. Having had no access to the internet due to my recent move I’ve been forced to look for jobs at work. Not an ideal situation, but one which has been reasonably successful. I’ve spotted a couple of Press Officer Positions going and one as an Editorial Assistant. The beautiful thing is that none of these positions require filling in overly complicated application forms. The job advertisements request a CV and front letter, and these are infinitely more enjoyable to complete, not to mention much easier. Fingers, toes and everything else crossed that something comes of them. Just an interview would give me some hope at the moment. So, in the past couple of weeks I’ve gone from quiet despair to steeled determination. I’m gonna try not to give any more time than is necessary to the stop-gap and finally get off my backside and hunt down a job I’m happy doing. And if it doesn’t work out immediately, I’m just going to have to hunt some more. DepartureAn afternote: I had a minor nervous breakdown this morning and quit this particular job. The next couple of weeks may be exciting… Read Matt's previous job logs:
Suggestions to editorial@prospects.ac.uk
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